Vivere Con Amore

Five months ago, an excited, slightly overwhelmed, yet extremely hopeful girl boarded a plane to fly to the other side of the world, focused on experiencing an adventure.  What I expected to be a memorable journey around on the other side of the globe, quickly became one of the great loves of my life. Contrary to what most would think, that great love we always hear about and desire is not always another person. In the past five months, I have experienced one of life's great love affairs. Not necessarily a love affair with travel or food, but I fell in love with life.

"To love life" seems like a simple idea. It also seems like a simple task. Too often though, we get so wrapped up in the minute details of life that we don't actually enjoy the journey. Before abroad, I would argue that I loved life. But being abroad and having had the true love affair that I did, I now know what it is to love life. To me, I know it's love because I have experienced happiness for the pure sake of being happy, love for the pure sake of loving, and being humble because there's no reason not to be.

Life has brought me around the world; into and around eight countries. It brought me to moments where I stopped in my steps to ask how I am deserving to be so exceedingly blessed. It has given me some of the truest friendship I could only have wished to gain. It brought me to meals that actually made me emotional. It gave me an education which was an accomplishment in itself, its not always easy to be focused and committed while abroad. It gave me moments where I laughed harder than I knew I could. It gave me nights that made me wish college would never have to end. It gave me and excessive amount of postcards, magnets, and souvenir glasses from around Europe. And while it didn't give me the ultimate Lizzie McGuire moment, there are no complaints as to what I was given. All of this brought me love. And though it may be completely cliche, I can honestly say I lived. 

And sitting in my Italian apartment, packing away five months of memories, I couldn't be more honored to have experience this part of the journey. I also couldn't be more excited that my family is coming to Italy, which means I get 3 more weeks to pursue this love affair. There are absolutely no words to express how thankful I am to have adventured as I did and learned to love as I now do.  And while you may expect tears of sadness that my journey is coming to an end; my tears are purely of joy that I got to do and feel the way I have. If anything, though no one actually ever wants to leave Italy, I am now anxiously excited to approach the rest of my life knowing what I now know. 

And when they ask me what being abroad taught me, I will say: 

Vivere con amore. 

(To live with love)

Faith That Follows

Four years ago, I spent an evening in Madrid at a Papal mass with over a million people. I kneeled in the crowd with my youth group family and worshipped along with Pope Benedict. Something happened that night though, during the mass a great storm broke out. There was intense thunder and down-pour during a hot August night and the mass was halted. I remember kneeling in the field with my closest friends and praying for God's protection and will. After a few decades of the rosary, the storm ended almost as abruptly as it began, and the mass began again. 

Today, I joined Pope Francis in the heart of Vatican City at Saint Peter's Basilica for Easter Sunday mass. Call it irony or call it symbolism, after countless days of beautiful Roman sunshine, a storm broke lose today. Standing in the square; surrounded by families, teens, religious orders, and even a few puppies; another storm broke out. After the first roll of the thunder, I was immediately taken back to Spain 2011 and the moments I shared in that World Youth Day mass. 

As a person who firmly believes in symbolism and signs, I spent much  of Easter Sunday mass reflecting on the journey. Between 2011 and today, I can now see the constant presence of faith. Regardless of where life takes us, faith travels with us. It is one of the most consoling and hopeful moments to honestly acknowledge that we are never truly alone. Along with my love for psychology: life is about perspective. The way we approach life is a matter of how we perceive it. In reliving these great moments of faith aside two popes and the universal church, I understand life to be a collaboration of moments of immense faith. The storm today reminded me that: Faith bears all things. Faith endures when the world is pitted against it. Faith carries us and faith protects us. And with faith, life is brought into a greater dimension. Each moment, each experience, each feeling carries more meaning because faith will outweigh every fear and raise us up. 

Needless to say, I am once again joyfully tearful at how blessed I am to have had such incredible encounters at just 21 years old. Standing in the center of Saint Peter's, at the foot of the cross, just feet away from Pope Francis I am reminded of how loved we are and how great He is.

It's safe to say that today was a very BUONA Pasqua. 

Finding Home(s)

I believe that I have a really simple idea of love. "Love genuinely, love widely". Call it naivety, call it optimism, call it however you see it; but there are infinite things in life to love and I give my heart freely. Love people because you should, love places for what they provide, and love ideas for what they stand for. I once had a friend tell me, "Brittany, you are one of the bravest people, because you love without the guarantee of receiving it in return." While I am the girl who is known for loving too easily and though I have been the punch line of many jokes, I am the girl who loves deeply. There is something that I have learned from my ideology and practice of love. That is: I can open up my heart to the places where I arrive and I can leave pieces of my heart where they are called to remain. 

Today I read something that embodied my idea of love:

"What is the best part of leaving your heart in different places? It's that everywhere feels like home."

-Buzzfeed

Traveling has given me the exciting opportunity to fall in love and feel love repeatedly.  And with my track record, this is something I gladly welcome.

~I fell in love with Saint Peter's Basilica and left my heart in front of the altar.

~I fell in love with the small, picturesque streets in Trastevere and left my heart resting in Piazza di Santa Maria.

~I fell in love with the Pantheon and left my heart gazing up at the detailed dome.

~I fell in love with the warm Roman sun and bright blue skies and left my heart below standing on cobblestone.

~I fell in love with the snow falling in Austria and left my heart in the streets of snow.

~I fell in love with the loud music and friendly souls in the underground European clubs and left my heart with strobe lights.

~I fell in love with seeing familiar faces on an occasional but reenergizing FaceTime and left my heart with those I love.

~I fell in love with living in the streets of the past and leave my heart both mourning and celebrating what is now our history.

~I fell in love with the Kebab stands in every European country, with a strong shoutout to Berlin, and left my heart in the comfort of the best sandwich I have ever had.

~I fell in love with community and kindness and left my heart in the gentle smile of an Italian elderly woman.

~I fell in love with Belgian waffles for breakfast and 15 beer Delirium samplers for lunch and left my heart in that bliss.

~I fell in love with the opportunity to wander and I plan on leaving my heart in Amsterdam, Barcelona, Corfu, Munich, and the Amalfi Coast.

~I have fallen in love with optimism, appreciation, and hope and left my heart in this experience.

~I am continually falling in love with this opportunity to experience love and leaving my heart in the places I now call home.

So though I may be the girl who believes in living and loving with overt passion; I have been able to leave my heart in the journey I have been taking around the globe and as a result I have found many homes. Home, a place that most people consider to have a singular meaning. I say, it could be more. We shouldn't be pressured to just pick one place as home. They say home is where the heart is, if so, I pick all of the above.

Discoveries.

"We travel, some of us forever, seeking other states, other lives, other souls."

Sometimes, we come across things that we truly connect to.  There are things in this world that speak to our true essence and inspire us. Of the things that have fueled me, there is this anonymous quote that encourages the very thing I desire right now in life.  I desire discovery.  I desire a love affair with life.  I believe that true worth in life comes from the opportunities that allow us to discover the world around us.  And to my great fortune, I am doing the exact thing that I wish for in life.

I have been able to move to a country that has always been a dream of mine to explore.  Italy is more than I could have ever hoped to encounter.  I have never felt so comfortable in a place that is so foreign to what I had been raised in.  Putting the incredible food, romantic language, and dreamy sights aside; I have fallen in love with the Italian way.  There is an unexplainable comfort and peace in this country.  I feel an intense sense of belonging and safety in knowing that I am exactly where my heart desires me to be.  I knew that I had officially fallen in love with Rome when locals began treating me as a local.  As simple as it seems, being approached for directions and then giving directions (in Italian) is one small, but meaningful way to experience this acceptance.  Although I may be substantially taller and blonder than the average Italian, I feel like Roman.  And for that, I can't begin to express my thankfulness to be here.

Even beyond Italy, I have found that we each are called to places to experience them and learn.  My time abroad, so far, has led me outside of Italy, to Austria and Germany.  It was in both of these places that I have continued to recognize a calling.  I felt that calling upon hearing about the loss of my aunt to cancer.  I found myself in Votivkirche Cathedral in Vienna lighting candles at an alter of prayer in her remembrance.  It was there that I was reminded in a prayer card that "we must remember the light in moments of darkness."  In Austria, while dealing with the loss for my family and feeling some guilt for being so far away during a hard time; I was reminded of our purpose in life.  I have been called to these adventures, I have been called to these experiences, and I have been called to learn these lessons.  While sight seeing during the day and exploring in the night in both Vienna and Berlin, I have been reminded of the importance to learn about life through travel.  And after the touristy days (Schronbrunn Palace, St. Stephens, the Holocaust Memorial, and the Berlin Wall) and "college kid nights" (underground dance clubs, German beer, and late nights that turn into early mornings), I can reflect in knowing that I am learning something about myself.  

The desire for adventure has lead to a desire to be better.  It's still overwhelming to think of the great opportunity I have been given.  I hope that the things we all learn are translated into actions rather than just fun memories.  I've discovered that this isn't just travel, but it's a time to learn how to be better and not just for yourself.

Until the next discovery, it's time for me to get back to the "study" part of study abroad.  Here's to another week of midterms and back to the other kind of learning.

Ciao for now. 

The Journey to Abroad and Its Arrival

I have always been a person fascinated with the unfamiliar.  The very things that are foreign to me, are the ones that I seek to explore. And in the turn of life events, I found an opportunity come before me, which asked me to embrace the unknown.  I am overwhelming blessed to find study abroad as apart of my life journey.  I have put the United States on hold to venture into and throughout Europe to pursue my education, encounter the world, and to grow.  From the initial applications, to falling to my knees in excited tears upon acceptance, and planning every last detail for the journey; I sit today in an Italian apartment recounting what my first few weeks in Roma have led me to.

I came into this experience with daydreams of the sights, ideas of the lifestyle, and expectations for my transition.  Everything that I expected for these initial days abroad have been entirely surpassed. I find myself in a place where I constantly feel comfort. I have been placed into an incredible Italian apartment that doesn't compare to any college student housing that I've seen before.  Between the hardwood floors, colorful tiled bathrooms, and balcony above a orange tree garden -- I feel like royalty. Not to mention that I've been sharing this villa with a hilarious and outgoing group of girls from across the States.  To cover the basics: the food is incredible, the weather has been almost entirely pleasant, and my neighborhood is welcoming.  I've been able to explore different corners of Rome: enjoying the major monuments, learning the different neighborhoods and their offerings, tasting true Italian food, meeting people from around the United States and of course the locals, truly testing my wit with public transportation, and taking on the Italian lifestyle.  I've been led to some incredibly beautiful and transformative sights along with having some memorable nights (its not all study). I couldn't be happier with the place I have come to, the classes I am taking to earn that Psychology degree, or where life has led me.

To put my feelings into an example, my joy can be recounted with my first trip to Vatican City.  On one of my first days as a Roman, I took a journey to Saint Peter's Basilica with a group of Saint Mary's abroad students.  As I rounded the corner and had my first glimpse of the Vatican, everything clicked in that moment.  My heart filled with an undeniable warmth. I stepped into Vatican City for the first time and tears fell from my eyes.  Sure, if you know me, this would look like another one of my "catholic girl" moments.  But this moment in itself was different.  This moment was a reaffirmation of everything I believe.  A moment to acknowledge my admiration and commitment to faith.  And a moment to be thankful for where this journey had brought me. In that moment, I cried, not because I was missing home; but because I had found it.

This is Roma.